Adoption Language and the Words We Use

Adoption Language in Adoption Profile Books

Whether you’re hoping to adopt or simply existing in this world, you should know the power of words. The words we use, when speaking about adoption and birth parents, can carry a positive or negative reaction. Choosing our words wisely, and knowing what words to avoid entirely, can help guide society into appropriate adoption language.

If you’re making an adoption profile book, you should know about the effects of adoption language and the words that you use.

“Give up your baby” 

The correct way to say this would be, “placing your baby.” Sadly, “give up your baby” is still a common term in society, so it’s the term that yields search results on google. Change takes time, and as adoption has become surrounded by less stigma, the hope is that the words surrounding it will change, too.

“Our child”

When you’re creating your profile text, you are speaking directly to the birth parent. Reminding yourself of that one simple fact can make a big difference in what you say.

“We promise to speak openly to our child about their adoption story and remind him or her how much their birth parents loved them.”

“We promise to speak openly to your child about their adoption story and remind him or her how much you love them.”

Do you see the difference? The child is, in fact, the birth parent’s, and you are talking to the birth parent. Writing your profile should be thought of as a conversation at the dinner table, you (and your spouse) sitting down with a birth parent(s). 

Past tense phrases should be eliminated as well. A birth parent’s love does not stop after placement “…how much you loved them.” Birth parents’ love is unconditional and everlasting.

“Choosing adoption”

One of the most important things we stress to hopeful adoptive parents is that not every woman who is considering adoption will end up placing their baby with a family. When you’re talking about “choosing adoption,” you should say “considering adoption,” – this makes things more open and reminds the reader that they are in control. 

Using negative adoption language is, well, negative. 

If you’re spending your resources on an adoption profile book, make sure that you’re doing it the right way. Work with a team that understands the power of adoption language. Seek out their help. Otherwise, the adoption profile book you make may be the main reason you don’t form a connection. 

Parentfinder adoption profiles include a book made for mobile viewing (and a printed version!), complete with video and a custom website. Reach out to us over phone at 317-652-7696, or sign up for a free consultation.

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